On the fifth day of the shiva for Command Sgt. Maj. Adir Shlomo of Sderot, OU Israel’s executive director Rabbi Avi Berman visited his wife Chani, and their four children, to be nichum aveilim. Shlomo, 47, was a police officer who was brutally murdered on Oct. 7 within minutes of arriving at the Sderot police station to open its armory. Although his family believed that he was missing, they learned four days after the fact that he had actually been killed.
“The family wanted to bury Shlomo in Sderot, and they got permission to hold a speedy funeral with 10 people and no hespedim (‘speeches’),” says Berman. “I’m not sure there is a good way for children to bury their father, but that’s definitely not the way.”
The OU’s connection to the family dates back over a decade, to when the Shlomos’ eldest daughter was an OU Israel Teen Center participant at Makom Balev in Sderot, one of 22 branches throughout the country.
For the past four years, 16-year-old Liav Shlomo has followed in his sister’s footsteps and participated in programs at Makom Balev. At the shiva, Berman asked Liav how many of his friends had come to visit him so far to be and be menachem avel, pay their respects.
The answer was zero.
“The family had no place to sit shiva, so they ended up at distant relatives in Mazkeret Batya, a town southeast of Rehovot,” says Berman. “That was the closest location they could find that wasn’t being bombarded by missiles. Since Mazkeret Batya is in a remote location, it was extremely difficult for Liav’s friends who were evacuated in regions throughout Israel to visit him.
“In normal times, when a child’s father passes away, the entire class and community come over and embrace him or her,” says Berman. “It’s a horrible feeling to know that your father was killed al Kiddush Hashem because he was going to defend the city of Sderot, and you are sitting, literally alone, without any friends visiting for days.”
Berman knew that Liav’s advisor in the program, 26-year-old Yanir Dahan, was planning to visit the following day from his temporary location in Eilat. He asked Dahan to bring some of Liav’s friends along to the shiva. They were the first ones to bring Liav a measure of comfort, at a time when he needed it most.
For Rabbi Berman, there was no question that he and OU Israel would help the Shlomo family in any way possible.
“I might not have had these kids from Makom Balev biologically, but Hakadosh Baruch Hu [God] put them into the OU’s hands,” says Rabbi Berman. “They’ve been attending our teen centers for years, and have grown up in the OU system. They’re part of our family.”
Dahan, Makom Balev branch director Nir Sharaffy and the center’s staff are similarly supporting Liav and his family on their path to healing, and plan to do so indefinitely.
“I really like going to Makom Balev and enjoy it very much,” says Liav. “I look forward to more meetings with Yanir and my friends. Since that Shabbat on Oct. 7 when my father was murdered, Rabbi Berman took our family’s loss and pain to heart. He immediately reached out to Nir and Yanir to see how he could be of assistance. He is also regularly in touch with my mother to ask how she is and how OU Israel may be of help, and always says that we are family.”
Liav’s mother is equally touched by Berman and OU Israel’s dedication.
“It means so much to me to know that there are people like Rabbi Berman, who truly care about our well-being,” she says. “He is someone whom I can truly rely on for support. He, and OU Israel, have invested their hearts and souls into helping us.”
Operating for 25 years, OU Israel Teen Centers serve as nonjudgmental second homes for more than 10,000 at-risk youth annually, who stem from neighborhoods in peripheral northern and southern regions like Akko, Yaffo, Kiryat Gat, Sderot, Nahariya and Kiryat Shmona, among others. OU Israel partners with local municipalities to establish teen centers within the cities or towns, and the municipalities direct them to local neighborhoods and schools that might benefit from OU Israel’s services. OU Israel then works with local government officials, Israel’s Ministry of Welfare and Social Affairs and local schools to identify specific youth in need of support.
Participants are between the ages of 13 to 18 and include native Israelis and olim from Russia, Ethiopia and India. Many come from broken families and impoverished communities where the education and incomes are subpar to those in central Israel. Often, they live in dilapidated homes that their parents cannot afford to repair.
As a leading organization helping at-risk Israeli teens overcome trauma, OU Israel strives to break the cycle of poverty, deepen teens’ connection to Jewish values, and give them a sense of belonging, responsibility, and confidence. Participants are empowered to graduate high school with a teudat bagrut (matriculation certificate), and to move on to meaningful frameworks including serving the country as members of the IDF or Sherut Leumi (National Service). Compared with 35% of teens from similar neighborhoods, 94% of OU Teen Centers “graduates” enter the Israel Defense Forces or National Service. There, they acquire skills and connections that propel their long-term success as contributing citizens of the State of Israel.
OU Centers offer youth a chance to decompress, connect with their peers and dedicated advisers, participate in stimulating, growth-oriented activities, focus on their emotional and spiritual health, and acquire critical life skills to help them become tomorrow’s leaders.
“The same group of about 20 teens progresses in the program through high school, often with the same advisor throughout each grade,” says OU Israel program director Chaim Pelzner. “They become a family.”
Each group meets at their teen center for three hours weekly, where they play games, prepare and enjoy a meal, and engage in informal learning and group discussions with their advisors about life, leadership and Jewish values.
“The youth feel heard and are never lectured to,” says Pelzner. “Discussions focus on themes related to their life stage, including volunteerism, belonging, bringing meaning to their lives as well as to others’ and future aspirations.”
Each month, they participate in a Shabbaton, trip or volunteering activity. A pre-military program for 11th and 12th graders focuses on meaningful service to the State of Israel and includes inspiring speakers, visits to mechinot (pre-army preparatory programs) and assistance with individual plans for each teen’s army service. There is also a mentoring program for alumni post-army service.
Since its establishment in 1999, OU Israel’s Teen Centers have helped 50,000 at-risk Israeli youth turn their lives around. About 92% of its participants develop positive relationships with their family and friends, and about 94% of alumni enlist in the IDF and Sherut Leumi, where they remain in touch with their advisors.
Alumni are so grateful for the program that more than 50% of advisors in a number of teen centers are former program participants. Liav’s adviser Dahan is one such example. Born and raised in Sderot, Dahan participated in Makom Balev as a teen. Now an economics major, he has served as an advisor at Makom Balev for the past four years. Dahan is among tens of thousands of evacuees from Sderot, and despite his personal challenges in the aftermath of Oct. 7, he traveled from Eilat to various cities countrywide, to meet his chanichim who are similarly displaced.
“They think of me as an older brother or a friend, and I view them as younger siblings,” he says. “Our close relationship and the fact that we relate to one another as equals makes them much more open and willing to share with me. They all have beautiful souls; each one is their own world. I foresee a great future for all of them and have every hope that they will reach tremendous heights.”
In the aftermath of Oct. 7, and with more than 100 Israeli men, women, and children still captive in Gaza, the death of family members and friends on the battlefield has become routine, spouses are absent for months at a time on reserve duty, hundreds of thousands remain evacuated from their homes and large-scale attacks threaten their daily security, Israel’s at-risk youth are experiencing the trauma particularly profoundly.
“We went through an event of biblical proportions, something that has never happened here since the country’s establishment,” says Pelzner. “The teen’s trust in the system is broken. They’re asking themselves, ‘How did this happen to us?’ ”
Robbed of their friends, routines and a sense of security, thousands of displaced teens are living indefinitely in apartments and hotels in hundreds of places throughout the country, some crowded into a single room with family members.
At least 80% of OU Israel Teen Center participants have had family members fighting in the IDF since Oct. 7. Many living in southern regions like Sderot experienced the Oct. 7 atrocities firsthand; some spent days in a bomb shelter and heard terrorists outside their homes. A number are experiencing the ongoing stress of their parents’ unemployment. Youth are scared, dangerously bored, and largely enticed to pursue unsavory activities, including drinking and drugs.
OU Israel Teen Centers Northern Israel regional director Refael Saaleb oversees branches in Tiberias, Kiryat Shmona, Akko, Nof HaGalil, Beit She’an and Nahariya, among others. A resident of Kiryat Shmona, he can relate to the teens’ plight as a fellow evacuee who has been displaced from his home.
“The branch in Kiryat Shmona is close to my heart,” Saaleb says. “Almost 70 of our chanichim who attend that branch were evacuated to over 220 hotels and guest houses all over Israel. Put a finger on the map, our youth have been relocated there. Evacuees are living a transient life with constant uncertainty about tomorrow, and the potential to be kicked out of their current locations at any time. They feel disposable.”
“I see what’s going on in the hotels because I visit one every day,” Saaleb continues. “I distribute gifts to young kids there and engage with evacuees. There is no framework for the teens. Even before the summer, they had classes at most three times weekly, for a few hours. They wander the streets all night and sleep all day.”
With no end to the suffering in sight, Pelzner says OU Israel’s Teen Centers are more critical than ever, in that they provide youth with a sense of normalcy, support, and a framework that they can consistently rely on.
“We are trying to rebuild their circles of trust,” he says. “Whatever the teens need, we are there for them. We want to build a better future for them and all of Am Yisrael.”
Throughout the conflict, OU Israel Teen Centers have been running programs, Shabbatons and offering emotional support to more than 6,500 teens, while keeping them connected to their peer groups. This is all being done despite serious damages incurred at 11 branches since Oct. 7, and teens and advisers being scattered throughout Israel.
“We can’t meet physically because we’re too spread out, which is a complication,” says Saaleb. “My number one instruction is that every madrich must speak to at least one chanich weekly by phone. If they can meet in person, it’s preferable, and OU Israel covers the transportation costs. We invest a lot of effort into maintaining connections with our teens and checking in on them. We encourage them to send us pictures and updates on our WhatsApp groups, and try to provide some form of a structure for them, which has literally been lifesaving for some.”
Saaleb notes that OU Israel Teen Centers’ staff work around the clock despite contending with challenges of their own. A few of them lost brothers in the war, three advisers’ homes were destroyed, and 24 staff members were evacuated from Kiryat Shmona and Sderot. While the centers typically benefit from Bnot Sherut who volunteers as staff, they have been reassigned to other, war-related posts.
“Our staff members from Sderot were shot at, and had terrorists knocking on their doors,” says Berman. “We lived Oct. 7, and we are still living it. Yet our staff have stepped up in unbelievable ways to get our teens through this, even though many are displaced, and 60% of them or their spouses have served in the war to date.”
The war has also had severe financial implications on many businesses and nonprofits. OU Israel invests $3.84 million annually in its Teen Centers and has relied heavily on additional funding from Israel’s federal government and youth departments in various municipalities. Sadly, many of those funds have been redirected to the county’s war efforts, leaving OU Israel with a considerable financial shortfall.
“The Israeli government’s recognition of our teams’ hard work boosts our confidence and underscores the extent to which our youth programming is vital for the success of Israel and future generations,” says Berman. “Unfortunately, we lost the funding for 2023 because of the war, and it appears that we will be similarly affected in 2024.”
To compensate for its significant financial losses, OU Israel is turning to friends and supporters in North America and beyond for help and has launched its new “Promise Me Tomorrow” fundraising campaign.
“Teens in Israel do not just represent our future, but our present,” says OU executive vice president and COO Rabbi Dr. Josh Joseph. “Our teens are experiencing trauma now and need a community now. OU Israel has been providing that community and elevating the emotional and spiritual lives of youth at risk for 25 years. We have more love to give them, and we need our friends’ and supporters’ help to be able to not only continue our level of support but to increase it during this especially traumatic period.”
Berman adds, “In just a few years from now, the teens that we’re working with, like Liav, will be our future soldiers, our future leaders, and our future fathers and mothers. We must invest in them today.”
For more on OU Israel’s Teen Centers Promise Us Tomorrow campaign, see: ouisrael.org/promise. Contact: Laya Bejell, director of marketing, OU Israel, lbejell@ouisrael.org.