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Living with purpose: Lessons from the teachings of the Lubavitcher Rebbe

Seemingly small, everyday acts of spirituality, kindness and connection are what truly give life meaning.

Community. Credit: Franz26/Pixabay.
Community. Credit: Franz26/Pixabay.
Rabbi Mendel Kalmenson
Rabbi Mendel Kalmenson is the author of the books Seeds of WisdomA Time to Heal and the best-selling Positivity Bias. His latest book, On Purpose, is being released in September. He is also the executive director of Chabad of Belgravia, London, where he lives with his wife, Chana, and children.  

Imagine there was something you could buy that would dramatically improve every aspect of your life. Everything you wish for—from financial success and physical health to happiness and self-esteem—would be granted or greatly enhanced. Even your sleep would be better and your cognitive function longer sustained. 

Remarkably, this panacea is not a groundbreaking technological gadget or some sort of mysterious elixir. In fact, it’s not a physical item at all. It’s that existential and often elusive sensation we refer to as “living with purpose.”

“Purpose” is a word that might spark an earnest conversation or reflective pondering through the night. There are so many people and so many billions of organisms in and beyond this world that it is natural for us to wonder if “little me” even has a unique purpose. And even if we are to assume that each individual has a purpose, the questions arise: “What is my unique purpose, and how do I find it?”

Many can recall a time when they felt a lack of purpose—being listless, unengaged and unneeded by the world. Purposelessness can also lead to a sense of fragmentation when our life, and even our identity, is splintered by the many needs, obligations and competing priorities that it comprises. Those who have experienced what it’s like to have purpose might describe being animated by a sense of meaning and eagerness to accomplish. Finding your purpose is like finding your “on button.” Suddenly, we feel alive and activated; suddenly, we have a more cohesive picture of what life is and a clearer vision of what it can be.

The positive effects of purpose are not just anecdotal but have been confirmed empirically. Research shows that people who feel they are living with purpose experience higher satisfaction in life, improved mental and physical health, lower risk of cognitive decline, better sleep, and reduced likelihood of anxiety and depression. Researchers from Boston University have shown that people with a higher sense of purpose had a reduced risk of untimely death.

Links have also been found between purpose and longevity. In studying “Blue Zones”—areas with high concentrations of people who live more than 100 years—Dan Buettner, a National Geographic Fellow and longevity researcher, found that having purpose was inescapably tied to living a long life. Studies have backed this up with estimations that people who prioritize purpose and meaning can increase their lifespan by up to seven years.

But despite the critical importance of purpose and the advantages of a purpose-filled life, only 25% of American adults can clearly describe what makes their life meaningful, and 40% report being neutral, unsure of whether they have a sense of purpose at all.

In explaining these worrying results, we can certainly point to many factors related to technology and our social norms that are unique to modern times. We are all at once atomized, yet hyperconnected. We are attuned to every issue or crisis in the world, yet more isolated than ever from the community and companionship that our soul craves. Our tranquility and ability to focus have also deteriorated as we try to mentally and emotionally assimilate more stimuli than ever before.

These factors are significant, and they require our collective ingenuity to find solutions.

This is what motivated me to research and write an upcoming book, titled, On Purpose: Practical Wisdom for Designing Life of Purpose, which presents teachings and insights of the Rebbe to help readers discover and actualize their unique purpose in life.

Known simply as the Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem M. Schneerson—considered to be one of the most influential rabbis of our time—was one of the greatest spiritual teachers and advocates of purpose-driven living. The Rebbe was largely responsible for Judaism’s revitalization in America post-Holocaust, and he turned the small Chassidic dynasty of Chabad-Lubavitch into a global juggernaut, now widely regarded as the most active Jewish organization, well-known for its thousands of Jewish outreach centers across the world. 

Ancient Jewish wisdom, particularly when viewed through the Rebbe’s perspective, has much to say about purpose, and it is from this well of inspiration that I culled the teachings included in On Purpose.

One the Rebbe’s foundational insights gets to the root of our ongoing societal struggle with purposelessness, which owes to our very conception of what purpose is.

There are two ways we can think about purpose: We can see it as that transcendent sense of meaning that we need to live fulfilled; the missing piece in the puzzle that is our life. Or we can think of purpose as being the very reason for our life; the way our life completes the puzzle that is the world around us.

If we treat purpose as just another commodity—albeit a more spiritual one—to enhance our life, then that leaves us pining after this elusive “thing” called purpose. But if we can adopt the latter mindset that we are here to fulfill our purpose, and not vice versa, then we can begin to discover our “why” with a new set of eyes.

This simple paradigm shift is the missing key to achieving the serenity and joy that comes with a life of meaning. The first step to finding purpose is realizing that purpose is the reason for our lives and not an accessory to it. We are born because we matter to G-d, and that means that we already have a purpose for which we are alive. All that’s left is to discover it.

Viktor Frankl, the famed Austrian physicist and author of Man’s Search for Meaning, put it this way: “Everyone has his own specific vocation or mission in life. Therein he cannot be replaced, nor can his life be repeated.”

Of course, knowing that G-d put you here to fulfill your mission is only a first step, and the book goes further in seeking to provide a roadmap, as well as practical tools and actionable steps towards finding your purpose. But this first step is a transformative one, and the foundation for all that follows.

If we internalize this lesson, then we no longer have to chase after something meaningful to complete us. Instead, we can look for the ways that Divine Providence has orchestrated opportunities to complete someone else or the world at large. This search is so much more likely to turn up what you are looking for, as the world is full of people and things that can use healing or help. But best of all is that when you become the missing piece—the solution—to someone or something else, it will in turn serve to complete you; infusing your life with newfound meaning, joy and purposeful direction.

Finding purpose is about realizing that it need not be found only in monumental achievements or global campaigns. Let’s change our operative question from “How can I change the world?” to “How can I change my world.” The Rebbe taught that the seemingly small, everyday acts of spirituality, kindness and connection, especially when directed at those whom G-d placed in your immediate sphere of influence, are what truly give life meaning. And that is how we can transform the world, one purposeful action at a time.

The opinions and facts presented in this article are those of the author, and neither JNS nor its partners assume any responsibility for them.
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